Paper clip hearts
by Attack.On.Waffles
Summary: A destiel high school au where Cas is a girl... I was really bored during lunch hour, so this kind of happened. Who knows? Maybe it'll go somewhere... Hope it's okay!
1. Chapter 1

Destiel highschool AU where Cas is a girl (maybe some SamxJess later on?)

 **A/N: Cas is a shy, quiet nerdy girl. Dean is the varsity quarterback who's dating the head cheerleader (Lisa), and Charlie, Jo, Chuck, Ash, and Gabe are his friends. Sam is still his little brother, and John is still his dad. Mary died when Dean was young, in a normal house fire in Lawrence, Kansas. Sam is a year ahead, so he's a freshman at 13. Dean, Jo, Charlie, Ash, Chuck, Cas, and Gabe are all in his grade. Lisa's a year ahead. Gabriel should be in the same year as Lisa- he's seventeen, but he got held back. For now, the story is in Dean's POV. This is like uber cliche, but bear with me here...**

I'm walking down the hallway on the way to first period and I'm in a bit of a rush. I'm going to be late again if I don't get my ass in gear. Generally, that wouldn't bother me, but Mrs. Whitman says she'll fail me if I'm tardy one more time this quarter. Which I only care about because I need to academically eligible to play on the football team. I speed up my pace.

All of the sudden, I slam into something. Not a wall, but a person. Books spill all over the floor.

I sigh deeply and look at a clock. No way am I going to make it to class in time now… I look down to see who I knocked down. I look down to see a girl wearing a worn trench coat over a gray pleated skirt, a button down, and a tie.

"Sorry. I'm sorry." I say, bending over to help her.

"No, it's my fault." She says, not meeting my eyes, "I wasn't looking where I was going."

I pick up a book, and grin, "Vonnegut?" I say, love Vonnegut. The stories are easy to read, and they're nice.

She's done gathering her things now, and she stands up, level with me. She meets my eyes, and I'm 95% sure my heart forgot to beat for a few seconds. She has the bluest eyes I've ever seen, surrounded by long dark eyelashes. She's wearing her wavy black hair in two messy braids on either side of her head. I realize I'm staring too late.

"I, uh, I… My name's Dean." I say awkwardly, holding my hand out for her to shake

"I know." She says, still looking me in the eyes and not blinking. It's a bit disconcerting, actually.

"What?" I say, pulling my hand back after she doesn't take it.

"I've been in your homeroom for two years now," She says. "Anyway, my name is Castiel."

I frown. "I think I'd notice someone like you."

"No, that's just the point." She smiles, "Nobody does. But that's okay. Anyway, I'm sorry for the trouble. You should be getting to class."

"Yeah…" I trail off, staring at her, trying to memorize as much of her face as I can.

She walks away down the hall, not looking back. For some reason, and I have no idea why, I yell, "Wait! Hey Cas," I jog next to her, "You wanna sit with me and my friends at lunch today?"

She looks puzzled, "Why would you want to sit with me?"

I laugh, "Come on, it'll be fun. Please?" I ask

"I suppose so…"

"Great." I say, "I'll see you then." I wave to her one last time and grin as she waves back and turns around, still looking confused. Then I shag ass to History. Shit, am I late.

-666-

"So, is she coming, or…" Charlie raised an eyebrow at me. She was sitting with Jo, Ash, Chuck, and Gabe.

"Yeah." I said, though he was starting to have my own doubts. It had been almost awhile, and it was almost time to leave.

"I'm sure that whoever she is will be here soon," Said Jo, patting me on the arm from across the table, "Isn't that right, Chuck?"

Chuck made a noncommittal noise and continued to type on his laptop, not looking up. Jo stomped on his foot under the table, making him jump and wince, saying, "What the fu-" but he stopped mid-word when he saw my face. "Look, man, maybe she got sick and had to go home. Maybe she fell down and she's in the nurse's office. Maybe she fell asleep outside during a free period and she's still sleeping." He looked at me with sympathy, "Anyway, I'm sure she didn't mean to bail."

"Mmmm." I said, pushing his mac'n'cheese around my plate. Charlie and Jo looked at me sadly, Gabe was grinning like an idiot, and Chuck had gone back to typing. Ash was completely zoned out, tapping his foot and staring at the clock. I sighed, getting up, "I'm going for a walk, okay? Alone."

"Yeah." Charlie said, "Okay. See you, Dean."

A chorus of, "Byes" and "See you arounds" were passed around the table. I waved before walking out the door.

I walked down the hall, with all inetntions of going to the music room to practice this song I was learning to play- _More Than A Feeling_ by Boston. I wrinkled my nose, walking past the library. I was about to walk all the way by, but something caught my eye- it was Castiel, the girl from before, curled up in a ball on one of the chairs, reading a book. I stop and stare at her for a few minutes, dumbfounded.

She doesn't notice me, but I walk in, intent to fing out why she ditched me.

"Hey." I say softly, not wanting to startle her, "Why did you skip lunch?"

Her head snaps up, and her eyes meet mine. I hold her gaze this time, and see several emotions flicker across her face; a first she's startled, then fearful, then she looks ashamed and breaks my gaze. "I'm sorry… I _did_ show up, but there were just a lot of people, and… I'm sorry- I swear I tried, but I just couldn't- I don't really make a habit of eating in there anyway- usually outside or in here- so it felt wierd, and-"

"Hey. Hey, it's okay, really, it's fine. I'm not mad- I was just a little worried…"

"Well, I apologize for worrying you," She said, her face neutral again.

"Alright…"

"I have to go. Class." She said, smiling and walking past him, "Maybe I'll see you again soon."

"Yeah…" He whispered as she walked away.

 **A/N: *offers cookies* Please rEviEw**

 **Okay, okay, I know- cheesy as all get-out, really cliche, but whatever. I was really bored at lunch today, so this kind of just popped out. I know it's like, crap right now, (Still way too unmotivated to get my lazy, procrastonating ass out to find a beta *cringe* please don't kill mee) but the next chapter will be better… If anyone wants me to make one… So- please review and follow/fav if you want more, and also you can check out the other story I'm writing- a DeanxOc high school thingy… So. Ok. I hope it didn't suck too bad :|**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Okay, I'm sorry it's been awhile… School's hard… And I've been working on updating my other story too (It would be** _ **way**_ **cool if you checked it out ;) So, yeah, I'm sorry it took so long to update this. Please don't be mad or anything… *Offers marshmallows* Ily guys 3**

"You'll need a tutor." Mr. Drake, my Chemistry teacher pulled my aside after class.

"Excuse me?" I say, hoping I misheard. I know I'm not doing too great in all of my classes, but still…

"Dean, if you want to pass this semester, I suggest you get help. As a matter of fact I think I have just the person. How about after school tomorrow, you come around to my room and you two can meet up- discuss making a schedule that will work for the two of you."

"Great," I say, not too pleased. Just my luck, I'll get some pimply nerd… I wrinkle my nose.

"I know you're not too pleased with this situation, Mr. Winchester, but I _strongly_ ," he said, in that tone adults use when they're all business, no shit, "Suggest you take this valuable opportunity and use it to your advantage. I will be assigning one of my top students to you."

"Okay… I'll be here. Tomorrow. Until when?"

"From dismissal until five o'clock. It can be your first study session."

"Joy."

"Mr. Winchester, this is your ticket to graduation. If you can't pass basic chemistry, you'll be held back. This is your life raft. I expect you'll treat it as such. This student is doing this for extra credit- I already spoke to them about it- and if at any point, they find that you are becoming an issue for their personal or academic lives, they can just come to me. And do you know what I will do? I'll give them the credit and let them walk away. You won't pass, you'll get held back, and I don't think you want that, so I suggest you treat them with the utmost respect."

"Yes sir." I say. I hate this, but if this is what it's gonna take to pass, then it's worth it. I can handle this.

"Glad to hear it." He smacks my back playfully, "Now scat! You're gonna be late for class."

-666-

"So, you're getting a tutor?" Charlie asked, walking down the hall with me, her elbow locked with mine.

"Yeah…" I pout, "It sucks."

She giggled, bumping me playfully with her shoulder, "Nah, it's not too bad. How about," She said, suddenly stopping, spinning me to face her, and grabbing my shoulders, "I take you out for ice cream after, and you can tell me all about your new tutor." She winked at me, eliciting a few catcalls and wolf-whistled from onlookers.

"Right." I say, still grinning.

Suddenly, Charlie's eyes go wide and she groans, looking over my shoulder at someone behind me, "Aw, the wicked witch has arrived," She said, using her favorite nickname for my girlfriend, "Seeya Ponyboy."

I flush at the nickname. Ever since she came over my house for a sleepover and caught me watching the sun set from my room, she's taken to calling me Ponyboy- like that kid from the outsiders. I turn around to see Lisa marching tward me.

She's a year older than me, and I have no idea how I managed _that_ one… But she was a junior and I was a sophmore when we started dating- I had just broken up with my first girlfriend, and I was pretty broken up about it, the way you always are with the first person you're ever with… Anyway, I was on the varsity football team- I still am- and she was the head cheerleader. I was the quarterback with the awesome hair and she was the hot chick with the rich daddy. Your stereotypical cliche highschool power couple. I never really had any feeling for her, romantically or… Otherwise. I guess there wasn't much of a personality to fall for.

She's mad, and I know why. I was talking to Charlie, who she hates. And Chuck, and Anna, and Gabe, and Jo, who she hates. I guess when she first stumbled upon me, playing catch with Jo after football practice was over- when she discovered I had a "golden arm", as she calls it- I was a loser, content in my loser-ness. I still act like one, she says (despite me having more friends than she does) and if I want to treat me like I'm special, I gotta act the part. Or something…

"-And, I just wish you would listen when I ask you not to hang out with those guys!" She's saying, making a huge scene and drawing attention, as usual.

"Lisa, baby, those guys are my friends. It's fine, right? As long as it doesen't affect us?" I step forward, offering a hug. She accepts, and the 'aww's and 'so cute's ensue.

"Yeah," She mumbles against my shoulder, "I just want to make sure you have your prioroties in order, you know."She sighs, "I worry about you."

"I know." I say, rubbing her back

"I love you, Dean."

"I love you, too, Lisa."

 **A/N: Okay, so I'm literally freaking the fuck out right now- I just finished season nine of spn and just ASGKJFLKJSKD AHH I CANT ... But other than that, everything's kind of smooth, exCEPT THAT MY PC CRASHED SO YEAH. JOY. I'll try to update at least weekly, for both stories, but I think the Deanxoc one is going to be my first prioroty right now... Yeah. And I'm sorry but Lisa's gonna be a shallow, underhanded bitch in this story- PLEASE DONT HATE ME I ACTUALLY KINDA LIKE HER- I JUST NEED A TEMPORARY ANTAGONIST. Soooooo I'll see ya'll laterrrr plz leave me some reviews to look at ;)**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: So, I edited my last chapter and reposted it- sorry about that. Um, no major changes, but I deleted the part about Emma. I think I'll bring her in later. I don't know when I'll be able to update again- school's making my life hell, sorry. Anyway, review and follow/fav, thanks :3**

 **ily guys.**

I sigh, walking down the dimly lit hallway of the school, tward the classroom where I'm supposed to meet my tutor of the next seven months. I groan inwardly, adjusting the straps of my backpack on my shoulders. I hate this. I don't want to be here. I crack my knuckles and face the door. It's shut all the way, and the light's on inside. I listen, and I think I can hear… A piano?

I blink. That's odd- I thought I was coming to a classroom… I look at the slip of paper Mr. Drake gave me earlier, and sure enough, I'm at the right place. I sigh and walk in.

What I see in there makes me blink several times and do a double take. Schools don't have places like this… Our school doesn't, anyway. It's not really that big of a room, it just seems that way. And it's definitely being put to use… I look around me. The walls are completely covered in posters of metal bands, punk bands, movies, TV shows, Mozart and Yo Yo Ma, Star Wars… There's a portrait of Einstein with his tongue out on the inside of the door, and one wall has a drum set and an amp with guitars- electric and acoustic, and in another corner, there's an easel and a huge open chest of paints of every color I can think of, the wall there hand-decorated. The last wall is completely covered by a huge bookshelf chock-full of comic books. There's a record player in the corner- I mean old-school record player- next to a soft-looking fluffy chair and a beanbag. There's stacks of books littered everywhere, aprons hung on pegs splattered over with paint.

"Woah." I say, impressed, "This room's awesome."

"Yep." Says a girl in the corner who I hadn't noticed before, "Hey. My name's Emma." She's got dirty- blonde hair and she's wearing a rusty-red leather jacket. Her hair is in a messy ponytail and she's got a worn Pearl Jam t-shirt on over ripped black skinny jeans. She's wearing a lot of eyeliner, but it looks good. She's really pretty, but not really my type. She holds her hand out to shake, and I notice the charcoal on her fingers.

"You draw?"

She looks at her hands, grinning, "Yeah, sorry." She drops her hand and wipes it on her jeans, "To answer your question, yeah, kind of, but Castiel's the real artist. She's amazing."

"Castiel? She's here?"

Emma laughed, "No. But, uh, she practically lives in this room when she's not in class. Matter of fact, that wall was done completely by her." Emma gestures to the wall covered in art, "She's gifted, that's for sure. Not to mention she's got, like, an IQ of 197… She's somethin' else…" She puts her hands on her hips, "So, what brings you here?"

"Oh. Well, I'm kind of failing Mr. Drake's class, and…"

"Oh. I'm not supposed to be here- getting in the way of tutoring and whatnot…" SHe winked, "Have fun."  
"Okay…" Dean shook his head as Emma left. He was about twenty minutes early, so he decised to look around. He went to the beanbag, where there were several sketchbooks piled up. The top one had **CASTIEL NOVAK** written in block letters on the front. Dean picked it up, unable to help himself.

"Woah," Was all he could manage, looking inside. There was a picture of what looked like a fallen angel on the first page, it had its knees pulled to its chest, and its wings almost concealing its body. It was sad but beautiful. Dean continued to flip through the sketchbook, pausing here or there to admire a truly striking drawing… There were trees, landscapes, people walking, laughing, smiling… Some were drawn in charcoal, and others colored pencil. He looked at his watch and quickly shut the sketchbook, realizing his tutor would be here soon. He didn't want to be caught snooping.

I grab a comic book and plop down, trying to act nonchalant.

The door opens.

I look up, meeting a pair of blue eyes.

"I think you're in the wrong room," Castiel says, "I'm supposed to be meeting-"

"You're my tutor?" I interrupt her

"Oh." She says, "I suppose so." She takes her bag off her shoulder and sits on the floor next to it, patting the ground next to her, "Okay. Sit."

I climbed off the beanbag to sit on the floor, "Okay, sure."

"So, first things first- Where's your chem binder?"

"... I don't have one?"

"That's fine. I have one here- I thought you might say that. So," She pulled a black binder out of her bag, "It's one and a half inches, two hundred pieces of filler paper, four pocket dividers, and a pencil case. There's a logbook in the pocket, too. So, the first issue we need to address is your organization."

"Okay…"

"So, I labeled all the pocket dividers as follows- Homework, Tests, Quizzes, Notes, and Handouts. So, use them to organize your binder. I'll be checking it every time we meet. Make sure it stays neat, alright?"

"Yessir."

She narrowed her eyes, "Dean, this is no joke. You need to improve your chemistry grade before the semester ends…"

"Sorry, sorry, I know." I say, taking a deep breath.

"So, the first thing I think we need to address is your notes, so let's take some on chapter three, section two…"

I nod along to everything she says, staring at her face the whole time, smiling at how she clearly loves this- teaching. And how smart she is, Emma wasn't kidding, that's for sure…

 **A/N: I'M TRYING TO FINISH THIS I SWEAR IT'S JUST SCHOOL… UGHHH. And Instagram… It's taking over my goddamn life. (my insta's .TARDIS_ Follow my shit blog please :)But I've been sick and we had an algebra test, and I had cross country and field hockey and I had to volunteer at the library and I had Math Team, so yeah. I've been busy. Please cut me some slack, thanks. Anywhoooo, you guys like it okay so far? I hope so, cause it's 3am, so if I fucked up, I just can't find it in me to care, hahahahaha. See ya'll later- I'll do my best to update soon, I PROMISEEEEEEE**

 **I love you guys :3**


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: Okay, I hope this next chapter is alright- I might not update for awhile, so I'm sorry in advance, but school has to be my first prioroty right now. I just have to get my shit together, guys. I'm sorry, I hope this is alright. Reviews make me want to carry on, so please, a little encouragement, maybe…?**

"... Are you even paying attention to what I'm saying?" Cas asked, looking up, meeting my eyes. She doesn't blink, just stared at me, raising a quizzical eyebrow. She doesn't look annoyed as much as amused. We've been working for almost a week now, every other day or so after school, so she's pretty used to my shit. It's a miracle that she's still here.

"Mm-mm." I say, smiling lightly, my chin resting on my fist.

"Really?" Castiel sits up, not breaking my gaze, "You wanna tell me what I was saying?"

"Sure." I say the last thing I remember her talking about, "Something about bonds? Chemical bonds? Some molecules have more than others?"

"Nice try." She clips my notes back into my binder, closing my book… "I think that's enough for today. You're probably tired. It's okay, we'll meet one more time before your test on Friday."

"'Kay, thanks." I smile at her as I grab my stuff, "Thanks, thursday."

"You're welcome, Dean." She smiles at the nickname. The first time I said it, she confronted me about it, but I figure it grew on her. Just like I did. 'Like some kind of moss or skin disease' I remember her saying. I grin inwardly.

"I'll see you then." I wave, opening the door, "Bye, then." I walk out, and for the first time in a long time, the part of my gut that feels empty, almost like a negitive space, eating me up ever since mum… It feels like it's… Not better, but like there's hope. I smile at the thought. There's still a chance for me.

-666-

I'm almost to my car when I realize I forgot my phone in the room. I'd just leave it there, but… What the hell. I'll just grab it quick. I have time.

As I'm walking down the hall, I hear the familiar guitar chords of a song I remember from my childhood… A song I hardly listen to anymore, though I still like the band quite a lot…

I recognize the tune immidiately, though, even if it's been years. 'Nothing Else Matters' by Metallica. I smile as I walk up to the door, reaching out to open it… But the voice that starts to sing makes me stop in my tracks, sending shivers down my spine.

 _So close no matter how far,_

 _Couldn't be much more from the heart._

 _Forever trusting who we are,_

 _And nothing else matters._

 _Never opened myself this way..._

 _Life is ours, we live it our way._

 _All these words I don't just say,_

 _And nothing else matters._

 _Trust I seek and I find in you,_

 _Every day for us something new..._

 _Open mind for a different view,_

 _And nothing else matters._

I opened the door after I recovered from my shock, looking inside. What I saw was really quite unexpected- It was Castiel, sitting on the stage with one earbud in, an electric guitar in her lap, and a startled look in her eyes, her fingers hovering over the strings still.

"Don't stop on my account." I grin at her, still a bit shocked to find Cas playing that song, but trying to hide it, I grin at her, "That was really something, Thursday," I smile, "It was great."

"Thank you," she mumbles, blushing furiously, "I was just learning the chords." She looks up at me and smiles a bit

"It was really great. I- uh, I came for my phone- I think I left it here somewhere…" I say, looking around

"Yes, I have it, you left it on the beanbag chair." She pulls it out of the pocket of her worn trench coat, "Here."

"Thanks, Cas." I say, smiling at her.

"It's fine." She turns around and sits back on the stage, settling back into the position she was in before I came in. She picks up the black guitar and stared at it in her lap.

"I had no idea that you played." I say.

She smiles a little sadly, "I really don't- it's more of a recreational thing for me- like drawing. It's kind of like doodling, but I don't use paper- I use my mind. I'm no good at either, though- music or art. I just like to do it for fun." She looks up at me

"I think you're pretty good." I say honestly, "I mean, that wall- that's you. You made that, and it's really cool. And I mean, I just heard your voice, and that was…" I smile at her, silently apoloizing for sucking at compliments, "I think you're pretty talented. Anyway, you're really smart, that's for sure."

She blushes a bright red, "Thank you, Dean."

"No problem, Cas. I'll see you soon." I smile at her and walk out the door. I look at my watch, "Crap." I say, bolting down the hallway, remembering I promised to go over Charlie's house after school today- we've been hanging out after every day after my study sessions. I hope she's not mad.

 **A/N: Okay, so I'm like really sorry- I don't think this chapter is even 1k words** _ **I know I know im a piECE OF SHIT**_ **but I'm trying I swear. But homework and Instagram and Tumblr and IT'S SPOOPY SEASON WHAT DO YOU EXPECT MY BRAIN IS FLIPPING THE FUCK OUT LIKE SENSORY OVERLOAD ASDLKJGHKSJH… So. I'm sorry. I'll update another chapter tonight or tomorrow, but then it might be awhile before I'm back. And I'm talking like a week or a week and a half. But I have that other fic to work on, plus I have thanksgiving vacation coming up so I can gET SHIT DONEEEE but yep. Drop me a review and tell me what a goddamn imbicile I am if you want; as long as it's a review, I'm cool.**

 **\- ALsO- for anyone who's interested, my instagram is .TARDIS_ (two underscores) and my tumblr is attack-on-tardis okie. bai frens :)**


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: OK, I said I was going to update today one more time, so here it is. I know it's not much, but I've got a lot on my plate right now, and I'm not even sure if I should keep writing this fic- Idk, I just don't think it's that good. Maybe it's because I didn't write the entire storyline out ahead of time? Idk, like I said, this was a really spontaneous thing that happened during a boring lunch hour. So you'll have to bear with me while I try to get my shit together. Thanks, guys. I really do appriciate it.**

" _Of course I'm not mad,"_ Charlie says to me as we walk up to her room, out backpacks, two spoons, and a pint of ben  & jerrys ice cream with us, "Well, not as long as you swear to tell me all the _juicy_ details." She grins at me.

"How many times do I have to tell you? I'm not…. I don't have a thing for Cas." I think, and then add, "Lisa sure thinks I do, though. She said I'm failing chem just to hang out with her."

"Well," Charlie says, popping open the container and sticking a spoon in, "Lisa is a jealous bitch."

"I concur." I say, and Charlie grins up at me. That was a thing we started to do a few years ago- the ' _I concur',_ I mean- after we watched some movie with Leonardo DiCaprio in it (Jo had a thing for him at the time), where, basically, he had to pretend to be a doctor or something, and the whole time, whenever anyone said anything to him, he just said 'I concur', so now me and Charlie do it as kind of a joke, and usually around Jo. It annoys the _hell_ out of her. It's hilarious when it isn't downright terrifying.

"So. Tell me all the details." Charlie says.

I do.

-666-

"Well," She says, tossing out the empty container of ice cream, "I think she's awesome; if she wasn't straight, I'd be _all up in there_."

"God, Charlie." I say, "Really?"

She grins, "Not gonna lie."

I roll my eyes, "Whatever."

She looks at me, "But really." She meets my gaze, "If it came to it, who would you choose?" She narrows her eyes, "Lisa or Cas?"

"Lisa." I say, after pausing far longer than I should have to. And I think we both know why I said Lisa, too.

Not because it's the truth, that's for sure.

-666-

"I just don't get it." Lisa's saying, "What does that little freak have that I don't?"

I sigh. It's been like this almost since the start. Lisa has an issue with Cas, and I don't really know why. Oh, wait, yeah, I actually do. It's because I, a heterosexual male, has been spending a freaking hour with her, a heterosexual female -who is NOT Lisa- outside of school. And doing what? STUDYING CHEMISTRY. It's driving me up the wall.

"Look, sweetheart. I need to be academically eligible to play on the football team, which means if I fail chem- like I almost did- Then that could mean no more sports. At all this semester, you understand? And I _have_ to work with her- it's not my choice- I don't even like her," I say, frustrated, words I don't mean slipping out of my mouth, "Look, she means nothing to me, okay? Zip. Zilch. ZERO. The minute I scrape by chem, I'll never talk to her again."

Suddenly, Lisa is grinning at something over my shoulder like she just won a million dollars. But not really- I mean, it's not a happy grin, more… I duno, malevolent, I guess. (God, Cas really _is_ rubbing off on me). Naturally I turn around, you know, to see what Lisa was looking at, and what do I see?

Castiel FUCKING Novak. She's just standing there, her eyes wide and stunned, like a deer in headlights. I open my mouth, shaking my head, trying to convey my message- _I didn't mean it! Any of it!-_ without actually speaking. Before I can walk up to her and explain _everything_ and how goddamn sorry I am- _I didn't mean any of it, Cas. Not one word!-_ She's gone. Turned on her heel and walked away. And somehow, I know she'll never believe anything I say. I rub my hand over my eyes, not wanting to wake up tomorrow and realize it wasn't a bad dream, not wanting to see Lisa's smug grin, not wanting to face what a _fuckup_ I am, and _most certainally not wanting to have to face Cas tomorrow._

 **A/N: Okay. That's all I have for you. I only had about 15 minutes to write this, so sue me. I did what I could. AnYwAyYy… THE PLOT THICKENS, right? My first cliffhanger. Whatever. I have no fucking clue when I'll be on again, but I'll do what I can :) Ily guys, and I'm doing my best.**


	6. Chapter 6

"… Shit, Charlie, I just really, really, fucked up this time."

"Yeah. You did." She says, looking at me from where she's perched on the bed next to me, her legs crossed under her and a closed notebook in her lap. I lean against the wall, exhausted after telling her what happened today. It was raining after school, and Sam got a ride home with a friend… So I came here. I was soaking wet when I showed up at her door…

"How do I fix this?" I ask, looking at my hands

"Honestly?" She says, meeting my eyes, "I dunno, ponyboy, I mean…"

"Yeah."

"... I do have one question."

"Shoot."

"What is she? To you, I mean."

"I…" I think. Not a tutor; she's more than that. Castiel is… she's… "I think, I mean, I'm not sure? I mean, I feel some kind of way when I'm near her, but, it's not… Not what I feel around you and Jo and Chuck; not what I feel around Lisa… I honestly…"

"You have no idea." She smiles at me, "Correct me if I'm wrong, but let me try to put it in words. When you think about her, even when you're about to cry, you feel the corners of your mouth turn up a little, and you feel this weird tickle tickle in the back of your throat, and your stomach tightens up, and you feel kind of you just smelled a fresh batch of gooey chocolate chip cookies, the kind your mom used to make, and you just, it feels so right."

"Yeah." I say quietly, lost in myself, "It feels so _right_."

She smiles even wider, grabbing my chin and forcing me to look her in the eyes, "Good sir, you are in _love_."

-666-

I end up staying the night at Charlie's. Her mom likes me for some reason, and she insists on apple pie every time I come over.

Clothes aren't really an issue- I stay over her place often enough (most sleepovers being impromptu, like this one), that I just said "fuck it" a long time ago and started to keep a duffle at her house. Soon I was upgraded to a drawer in her dresser, though, so I have two spare shirts, a pair of jeans, and a toothbrush at her place. I'll be okay for the night.

"I'm just gonna call Sammy," I say to Charlie, who nods.

As I'm scrolling down to Sam's contact, another person's number catches my eye.

Castiel's.

I close my eyes, scrolling on.

"Hey, Sammy." I say, smiling into the phone, walking out of the room, closing the door behind me, "I'm crashing at Charlie's tonight." I say, sighing.

"Rough day?" I can almost hear his smile. It's infectious, because soon, I'm grinning too.

"Yeah." I say a little sadly, "Rough day."

"Heard about Cas."

"God. Already?"

Sam laughs a bit, "Yeah."

I take a deep breath.

"It's okay. I'll see you tomorrow."

"See ya, kiddo."

"'Night." He says, "Jerk." He hangs up.

"Night, bitch," I whisper to the deadline.

I stretch and yawn. All I want right now is to make things right with Cas.

-666-

Before I know it, I'm at school again. It's monday. Which means I have to talk to Cas.

Which means I have to explain.

Which means I have to face the possibility of never getting to talk to her again.

"Dean. Come on." Jo punches me in the arm, "We need to talk."

Today, she's got her hair in a messy ponytail, wearing a Jimi Hendrix t-shirt over a pair of shredded black skinny jeans. And boy, does she look pissed.

"You heard." I say. It's not a question.

"Yeah, you know, I did. And for Lisa? Really? Of all people to send your friendship to shit for…"

"We _weren't_ really friends!" I exclaim.

"Right." Says Jo, "Which is why even though you have to study with her on tuesdays and thursdays, you've been hanging out almost everyday after school. Also why I saw her teaching you the chords to _Nothing Else Matters_ by Metallica. Because _that totally pertains to chemistry._ " She says sarcastically

"Jo-" I try, but she's not done yet.

"Not friends, Dean? Really? Because you've known her for all of three weeks, and I'm sure she knows you better than Lisa _fucking_ Braeden does, okay?"

"I know." I say.

"Well, then." Jo says, "Stop wallowing in your goddamn self pity and fix what you fucked up, Winchester." She glares at me, "You know where to find her. _Go._ "

"Right." I smile a little, "Thanks, Jo."

She half-smiles at me, "You're welcome, Dean."

-666-

Just as I get to the classroom where I know that Cas will be, Emma walks out the door. The minute she catches my eye, I know I'm dead. She walks up to me, anger practically _radiating_ off of her in waves.

" _Winchester_." She hisses, slamming my shoulder into the wall, making me wince- she's stronger than I thought. " _You had better be here to apologize, you piece of shit._ " She spits, "Cas has been hurt by _too many people_ , and I was stupid enough to think you wouldn't be one of them." She pulls her hand off of me like I burned her, "I thought you'd be good for her. I guess I was wrong. Make me rethink that, okay?" She glares at me, turning on her heel and walking away.

I take a deep breath. _God, what was I thinking, coming here?_ I shake my shoulders, steeling myself, walking into the room, but what I see is the opposite of what I'm expecting.

Cas is there, but she's not in tears, she doesn't look angry, nothing…

She's drawing in her sketchpad, but she looks up when I walk in, "Oh. You're here." She says, and all the warmth is gone from her voice- I mean, it was never really _warm_ , but she was always… I don't know. Friendly to a certain extent, despite her bluntness. Like… She was never cold. Not the way she is now.

"Yeah." I say, "Look Ca-"

"We need to review chapter three, section four." She says, as of I wasn't talking, "I assume you brought your notebook with you?"

"Yeah, but-"

"Okay, take it out, and you can write your notes, then compare them to the ones that I have here-"

"Cas!" I say, grabbing her arm, "I'm not here to study!"

She looks up at me, frowning, "Then why did you come?" She looks genuinely confused.

"Because… God, Cas, I'm sorry."

"Why?" She looks at me in the eyes, and I see confusion, sure, but beneath that, hurt. I don't see anger, or fear, or confrontation. She just looks so... broken. Like, like she's been hurt by too many people. And right then, I resolve to never again be one of them. Because I hate it. Not only that, but I resolve to fix her, however I can.

I take a deep breath, "Because I know you heard everything I said to Lisa."

"So?" She says, her eyebrows knitting together, "I don't understand; I already knew everything you said- it's nothing new." She smiles at me, "There's no reason to feel bad."

"Cas," I say

"Dean?" She looks at me again

"You don't mean that." I say with certainty.

She sighs, "Dean-"

"Why are you making this so hard?" I ask, "Look, I was wrong. More than that, I was a complete asshole." I try to look as honest as I can, "And I'm really sorry, Cas. I am. I screwed up, and I want to fix it. I want to be your friend again," I hastily add, "If you'll have me, that is."

She smiles. For real this time. "Okay,"

 **A/N: What the hecking heck is wrong with me like I hate this story and idk, i'm losing my motivation or something but i'll try to finish it… if you've got any ideas, PLEASE DO SHARE WITH THE CLASS no i'm not kidding i have gone imaginatively bankrupt where this story is concerned like help plz**

 **p.s. i'm sorry for the shortness, but as i said- I PLEAD IMAGINATIVE BANKRUPTCY**

 **ok but ily guys, please keep reviewing- It seriously boosts my self confidence (which is lower than Dan Howell's pants i shit you not) and follow/fav**

 **but eSPECIALLY rEViEw**

 **ok ily guys :3**


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: So, guys, I know I've been awhile, but everything has just been kind of chaotic lately, and I'm having a hard time keeping up with it- writing specifically. So, like I said, I'm doing my best, and all I can ask is that you bear with me. Thanks. I love you busy. Really 3**

 **-possible trigger warning for this chapter; be safe m80s-**

 **-seriously, don't read if you're sensitive to certain content and you're at risk of being triggered-**

I'm not sure how long me and Cas stayed there, her rubbing small circles on my back and whispering in my ear that it was okay. That everything was okay.

I sigh as the sleepy calm that settles over you after a cry sets in, feeling like an invisible weight got lifted off my chest.

I blink. I'm tired. Really, tired…

"Sshhh." says Cas, "If you want, you can fall asleep here on the beanbag chair. Is there someone you want me to call? Someone who can take you home? I just don't think you should be driving like this."

I smile sleepily at the way that she can go from being a friend- a peer, to a caring adult, almost like a teacher. Almost professional. "Sure." I say, handing her my phone, "Charlie. She won't have gone home yet."

"Okay. You can crash here 'til she shows up." Cas says, walking out of the room with my phone and closing the door behind her, presumably to call Charlie.

I close my eyes, exhausted. I'm glad I fixed everything with Cas. Relieved, even. But any feeling of elation I have immidiately turns into a pang of hurt and guilt, remembering what just happened. Remembering why I'm here.

I just want to sleep. Because when I'm sleeping, I can't think. And that's what I want right now- to be able not to think. It's what I need.

I close my eyes and drift away.

-666-

I'm not sure how much time has gone by when Charlie shakes my shoulder to wake me up. "Come on, Dean. I'll drive you home."

"No." I say, pleading, "I don't want to."

"You can stay at my house, then. I've called Bobby up, and he's fine staying with Sam for the night, okay?"

"Yeah." I mutter. Bobby's an old family friend- almost like an uncle to me and Sam. He comes up often, usually to visit me and Sam or to have a drink or two with dad.

"He was planning on coming up tomorrow, but he's okay with staying the night." She smiled at me, "Plus, I called Sam, made sure he got home okay, and I explained that you're alright, but staying over my house for the night." She said, "He was worried; I guess word travels fast around here, and he heard about earlier."

"Yeah." I say, swallowing around the lump in my throat.

"Let's go." She smiles, offering me a hand to get up. I take it gratefully.  
"Can you…?"

"Sure," she says, anticipating my question, "Just gimme the keys."

"Thanks," I smile a little, "Don't you dare hurt her," I warn

"I won't," she rolled her eyes.

"Okay." I say, smiling a little, knowing I don't even have to say that to Charlie. She loves this car more than anyone, second only to me. I actually taught her how to drive it last year. I learned when I was thirteen, and had already been driving (illegally) for a few years when I got my lisence. Driver's Ed is obnoxiously expensive, so I guess we just went ' _fuck it'_ and kind of taught ourselves.

"Look, Dean, Jo didn't mean-"

"Don't," I say, cutting her off. I know It's rude, and I know Charlie doesn't deserve it, but I can't let her try to justify Jo's actions.

"She didn't mean to bring up Anna, and she feels like shit about it."

"Well, she _should_."

"She was our friend, too, Dean. It's been almost three years."

"That doesn't make it hurt any less." I say

"I know, Dean." She says, "I loved her, too."

"We all did."

"We still do."

"Yeah, but-"

"I'm not saying that Jo using her against you was in any way okay, because it isn't, but try to forgive her,"

I open my mouth to object, but Charlie cuts me off again, "I'm not saying today, Dean. And I'm not saying tomorrow. But I am saying that Jo's practically your sister, and it hurts _both_ of you to be without each other."

"Well…" I said, trying and failing to find fault in what Charlie said.

"I'm not wrong."

"No, you're not." I admit, smiling a little, then yawning, as the exhausting calm that spreads over you after a long cry settled on me. My eyes drooped a little.

"You staying over again tonight?" She asks, even though she already knows.

"Yeah, yeah, I think so." I mumble, leaning my head against the window, letting the dull roar of the engine and the poppy music Charlie insists on lull me to sleep.

-666-

"You want to talk about it?" Castiel asks, looking at me

We're in the room we usually study in, and it's warm, unlike the cooling october air outside. I meet her gaze, her eyes a cold, icy blue, but, though intense, her gaze is warm and caring.

And I want to talk about it. I want to tell Castiel everything. Everything I wouldn't be able to say to Charlie, Jo, Sam, or _god forbid,_ Lisa. I've known her a few weeks, and I would trust her with just about anything. It's scary.

 _Good sir, you are in love_ , Charlie's words echo in my head, and I sigh, denying it.

I bite my lip, and though my brain says it's a bad idea, by mouth forms the words anyway, "Yeah." I hug my middle and lay back against the beanbag, Cas scooting next to me.

"Okay," She said, looking at the ceiling.

"There was… A long time ago, there was this girl, Anna..." I took a deep breath, and then said, "Anna was… I knew her for my whole life." I sigh, "And she was cool. She was _great._ She had this beautiful, red hair, and she always wore the same leather jacket, this beat up, old, brown piece of shit, but it made her comfortable, and she looked nice enough… Anyway, I got to know her, and… We, we'd hang out. All the freaking time. We were like brother and sister, but closer. I mean, yeah, yeah, I guess, Lisa's my first _real_ girlfriend… But, I dunno,I feel like Anna was more than that, somehow. She was my first kiss, you know? My first everything, actually."

I sigh, "I don't… I don't know why I'm telling you all this." I say honestly. "Frankly, I don't… I don't understand why you care." I close my eyes a little, making the room blurry, everything blending together. I think I like this world better; it's all fuzzy, and there're no sharp edges. Nothing to bump into and get hurt on.

"She was always there for me, Cas. I remember, we used to sit on my roof and watch the sun set over the forest across the street. I still watch them sometimes, when I miss her too much. It's why Charlie calls me Ponyboy, after Ponyboy Curtis, the boy who watched the sunsets, and wondered if Cherry Valance could see them too, no matter how far away she was.

"It never helps, thinking about her. It makes it worse, sometimes. Sometimes, I can fool myself into thinking I can throw a pebble at her window at two 'o clock in the morning and she'll be awake, waiting to go to fucking McDonalds' at two am or go egg an asshole's house with me…"

I swallow hard, "She was there for me so many times, and I wasn't… I wasn't there when it counted, Cas. I screwed up big time…" I shiver a little, "See, Anna had depression. It was real bad. She tried… Once, before I knew her, she tried to kill herself. She was in a 'mental correction facility' for almost six months, and I missed her… So, _so_ much. I should have seen the signs… But I didn't, and when she tried again…" I choked up, "When she tried again, she got it right."

I closed my eyes, willing the tears not to fall. "She saw a therapist. Got help. Everyone thought she was better, even _I_ thought she was better. I was so close to her. She told me things she never told her therapist, I should have seen it coming… Been able to stop it…"

Cas put a hand on my arm, "... I was the one that found her. She… God, Thursday, _why?_ She was… She slit her wrists. She bled out in the tub, and she had the door locked, and, shit, _why?_ Why does the worst shit happen to the best people?"

She stayed silent.

"I just… I remember, just, _weeks_ of nightmares, of screaming, of split knuckles and missed homework, and failed tests, and punching holes in walls, and just, _losing it. I lost my mind, Cas._ I was ready to die. I _wanted_ to die. I… I was almost always drunk or sleeping. I couldn't be at home, because everything looked the same way it looked when she was alive… and it shouldn't. It _couldn't_. Because everything wa so different, how could _anything_ look the same? It was so _wrong_. Yeah, the sun rose in the East and set in the West, the stars shown at night, I could breathe, my heart could beat, I could live, but I didn't _want_ to."

I close my eyes, and I hear the echo of her voice. See her face, her eyes, and I could _feel_ her.

"I understand." Said Cas, looking at me. She did, and I saw it in her eyes. And I felt better, somehow. Looking into her eyes, seeing the understanding, but not pity. I saw that she had felt loss. Not the kind of loss that most people feel… Not grief, per se, but the feeling of a piece of your heart, of your _soul_ itself being ripped violently away from you.

For the first time in too long of a time, I felt understood. And I liked it. I liked it a lot.

 **A/N: Okay, so I had virtually** _ **no**_ **time to make this (I'm sorry for using English class, Mrs. Chwiziki plz dont h8 me) but yea…. I had like downwards of 15 minutes to whip this up, but I almost shit bricks when I realized it had been, like a month since my last update… IM SORRY REALLYYYYY**

 **\- bUt, november break is like, in two days, so that's my chance to gET SHiT DONE.**

 **R &R ily guys :)**


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: ALRIGHT ALRIGHT I KNOW SAID ID UPDATE SO HERE YOU GO**

It's been about three weeks since I had a study session with Cas that's been anything other than a study session, and the only time we've really hung out other than that is in the library during lunch (she still hates the cafeteria) and that one time that the whole gang went to see the new Star Wars movie together, and that was the _whole group_.

It's cool, though. We're just friends, so I'm not really sure what I expected. Halloween's coming up, so during lunch on Friday, I decide to invite Cas to come trick-or-treating with me, Jo, Charlie, Sam (who's bringing some blonde girl he's _totally infatuated_ with, Charlie's words, not mine), Chuck, and Ash.

"You're not too old for trick-or-treating?" Cas asks

"Never too old for free candy." I reply honestly, "Don't worry, Charlie and Jo will take care of the costumes,"

"I suppose…"

"Awesome," I say, "Let's just tell everyone else…" I grin, "Oh, and can Emma come too?"

"I will ask her."

"Awesome." I smile, "I'll see you 'round, okay Thursday?"

"I will… See you as well, Dean." She smiles a little back at me.

I wave at her and walk away, grinning to myself a little. Halloween is gonna be so much fun.

-666-

"... Do I really need to wear _this_?" I hear Cas ask from the other side of the door.

"Yes." says Jo stubbornly.

"What are you- ouch!"

"Ssshhh."

"I don't think this is really necessary-" Cas says. I smile a little. It's finally halloween, (I can hear Charlie blasting 'It's almost Halloween by Panic! At The Disco downstairs right now, actually) but I have no idea what Cas is going to be. All I know is that Jo is completely in charge of getting her ready, and she wouldn't let me see the costume.

I look down at _my_ costume, grinning. I'm supposed to be batman, but I'm not wearing my mask right now. My costume is black jeans, and a black hoodie with the batman logo over a black t-shirt. We're all being superheroes, actually. Charlie is Poison Ivy, Emma is Harley Quinn, Ash is Superman, Jo is Wonder Woman, and Chuck is Spiderman.

All of a sudden, the door opens up, and Jo walks out in full costume, looking extremely satisfied with herself. "Have fun, you two." She tosses me a conspiritorial glance, "Good luck Dean." she winks, leaving me still leaning against the door frame until Cas walks out of the room, and anything and everything I was thinking flies out of my head.

She looks a little flustered and _really_ violated. Her expression is one of annoyance and confusion, but, she's…

"Oh," SHe says, looking up, "Dean. I wasn't aware you were here." She looks down at her costume distastefully, "I'm not sure I really like this… I'm not even sure who _catwoman_ is…" She frowns at her shoes, and I take the moment to look at her. _Really_ look at her.

I always kind of thought she was pretty. Really pretty. But now, she's… _Wow._ I want to say she's hot, but she isn't. Lisa Braeden is hot. Somehow, Cas is _more_ than that.

She's wearing a tight, black, strappy top, and tight leather pants with knee-high black leather boots, and she's holding her mask in her hand. The costume looks amazing, and it shows off curves I didn't even know she _had._

Another thing:Jo managed to put makeup on her. I never really noticed the _absence_ of makeup, but I can definitely tell it's there now. It's mostly on her eyes, dark smudges of eyeliner making her eyes even more striking than they were before, and mascara making her already thick, dark eyelashes that much longer.

"Dean?" She says, and I realize I'm staring.

"I- uh, um-" I clear my throat, "We should go downstairs." I manage, trying for a grin.

"Okay." She says, following me. The click, click, click, of her heels tapping on the wooden floors of the hallway in Charlie's house is distracting. When we finally get downstairs, Jo is grinning evilly at me from the couch.

"Hey, Charlie," I say, "How about you hand out the pillowcases for the candy. I need to talk to Jo for a minute. In the kitchen. _Alone_."

"Okay." She gets up from the couch to follow me.

When we get there, she closes the door, and I round on her. " _What was that about?_ " I hiss at her

She smiles, "Nothing you couldn't handle. I was just trying to help you realize your feelings for Cas."

"What- I, Jo-"

"Don't deny it."

"I wasn't going to."

"Good. Look, Dean," She reaches out and grabs my arm, "You know I'm sorry about what I said, you know…"

"Anna." My voice breaks, and I'm not even ashamed.

"You loved her," Jo said. "But we all did." She sighs, "And if she was anything like I remember… Dean, she would want you to move on."

"I can't just… forget her."

"I know." She closes her eyes, leaning against the sink, suddenly spent. "God, Dean. I know. And you don't have to forget her, but you _need to move on_. You loved her, but she loved you, too. And she would never want this for you. Dean, let's be real for a minute." She opens her eyes and meets my gaze, speaking with a newfound strength.

"Anna loved you. You loved her," She says, "And if it had been you, Dean, if _you'd_ died, what would you want for Anna?"

"That's not a fair question." I croak.

"Yeah, it's plenty fair. Answer it, Dean."

"I would… I would want her to grow up, go to college, find a life, maybe have some kids… I would want her to be happy her whole life, even if it wasn't with me."

"Do the same thing for her." Jo hugs me, "You both deserve it." She holds me tighter, "It's time to let her go, Dean."

All I can do is hold Jo tighter than should be possible. "Okay. _Okay._ "

-666-

We've been out for almost two hours, and we've hit so many houses that I have almost five pounds of candy.

"Let's go back," Says Jo, "It's getting kind of late."

The group agrees, and we make our way back to Charlie's house, where we've all decided to stay the night together. I smile, hoping we'll watch a movie or something fun.

Cas shivers next to me, and I look over at her. "You cold?" I ask her

"This costume was clearly not made for warmth." She said, shivering again.

"Here." I say, taking off my sweatshirt and handing it to her.

"Dean, I cannot take this from you," She said

"Relax, Cas," I say, "You'll be giving it back to me later, and I'm not cold now."

"Okay," She said, accepting the sweatshirt gratefully and putting it on, "Thank you, Dean." She said, sighing a little from the warmth and wrapping her arms around herself.

Before I can stop myself, I wrap one arm around her shoulder, pulling her a little closer to me.

She looks up at me, startled, but I just smile at her. "Happy Halloween, Cas."

"Happy Halloween, Dean."

I smile, and we walk back to Charlie's house with our arms linked. Neither one of us is cold anymore.

 **A/N: I know this chapter is short, but I'll be updating another one right after, and maybe another one later today or tomorrow. I know it's been, like, a month, but I've been really busy and haven't had that much time on my hands... Anyway, there's another chapter coming up, so you can check that out, and I hope you guys enjoy it! Thanks for being so patient :)**

 **-Elizabeth**


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N: Okay. Here's the update I promised. I know, it's tiny, but, like I said, I'm pressed for time. t's also like, 3am, and I don't have a beta, so it's probably riddled with errors. I'm sorry, but I'm doing my best. I hope it's okay...**

When we all get to Charlie's, everybody drops their pillowcases full of candy at the door and goes to get changed into pajamas. We've decided to watch this old horror movie called _The Birds_. Cas isn't really into it, but Charlie offered to let her watch _Hocus Pocus_ with her little sister upstairs, and Cas decided to suffer through it with us.

What I wasn't expecting was Cas to come out of the bathroom looking sleepy in a pair of _Doctor Who_ lounge pants and an old, slightly worn Led Zepplin shirt. I mean, the pants, I got. Sure, Cas is a nerd, I mean, I expected that. The Zepplin shirt, not so much, but she _was_ playing a Metallica song the other day. What really got me were the _glasses._

I mean, I guess I just wasn't expecting them. They were black, but they made her eyes look _way_ bigger than usual, and just…

"You wear glasses?" I ask her, hoping she can't see me blushing.

"I… Yes," She says, "I usually wear contact lenses, but I have to take those out at night, so…"

"I'm… Um… I'll go make some popcorn…" I say, cupping the back of my neck akwardly, and walking into the kitchen. I can _feel_ Cas's confused stare follow me out.

" _Someone_ has a nerd kink." Said Jo from behind me, whispering in my ear, and I can tell she's smirking.

I jump, "Jesus, Jo, I didn't even hear you walk over." I say, grinning at her

"You're getting rusty, Winchester."

"Maybe."

"It's true though." She says. And, after a moment, "Dude, you should tell her."

"Tell who what?" I ask, even though I know exactly what she's talking about. I haven't taken my eyes off Cas since she walked into the room.

"Lisa and Cas. You need to tell them both how you _really_ feel about them."

I tear my eyes away from Cas, meeting Jo's eyes, "What if _I_ don't really know how I feel?"

She smiled at me, "I think you can figure it out. I have enough faith in you for the both of us, I think."

I roll my eyes, "I think you have a lot of misplaced trust, Jo."

"And I think you do, too."

-666-

"You cold?" I ask Cas, looking over to see her shivering.

"A bit." She admits, "This costume was clearly not made with the intention of keeping the owner warm."

"Yeah." I chuckle, I bet." She shivers again, and before she can ask what I'm doing, I take off my hoodie and pull it over her head.

"Dean-"

"Put your arms through and shut up," I say, feeling my cheeks flush a dark red, and thanking god she can't see them, though I'm not sure why I'm embarrassed.

'Thank you," She says quietly, grabbing my hand. I hold hers, and neither of us is cold the whole way home.

-666-

"I think we've got about three pounds of candy _each!"_ Charlie said, excited.

Emma grinned, "Wanna trade some?"

"Yeah," Charlie replied, the two disapearing upstairs, chatting and oblivious to everyone else.

"Well," Said Jo, "I don't think we'll be seeing them again tonight, so we may as well watch some movies,"

So now, we were all sprawled on the furniture, watching Tim Burton's _The Nightmare Before Christmas._ I sighed, looking at the clock. It was the third movie we'd seen that night, after _Hocus Pocus_ and _The Birds,_ which Cas hated.

Speaking of Cas, ever since that movie, we've kind of migrated closer and closer to each other on the loveseat, and now we're kind of cuddling. Not that I'm complaining.

She snuggles a little closer, sighing contentedly, and I realize she's asleep. I smile, wrapping my arms around her and fall asleep to the white noise of Jo and Ash talking through the movie, Cas entangled with me on the loveseat, and, for awhile, everything is right with the world.

For the first time in a long time- too long- I fall asleep happy.

 **A/N: Okay, so here's the deal: I've been really busy lately, and I've got a lot of pressure right now that I'm dealing with, but I think it'll all turn out okay. It's been like a month since I updated, so I hope this is okay. I'll try to update faster, I swear. Ily guys, and thanks for being so patient.**

 **-Elizabeth**


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